Well, as far as labels go…I’ve been a mom of multiples, a mom of all girls and now an adoptive mom of our son from Colombia. I’ve been married for 15 years and have 5 kids. Our oldest are 13 year old identical twin girls. For the sake of privacy, we’ll call them Bird and BoBass. Bird loves lacrosse and science while BoBass prefers soccer and art. They are both turning into teenagers right before my eyes (yikes!) and both have an empathy for others that makes me think maybe we are doing something right (or at least more right than wrong). Next comes 12 year old JMan, our only son, adopted from Colombia at age 11. He loves soccer and school (thank goodness!) and his inner joy is contagious. He is confident and fun-loving, constantly making us laugh with his sharp wit. Close behind is Boo, our 11 year old daughter. She loves dance and is a serious student. She is an old soul but has found her silly side, entertaining the family by dressing up and directing her little sister and sometimes her brother . And little sister, she’s 6. We’ll call her The Diva (that’s what her sisters and brother would say). The Diva loves everything and everyone (seriously!). She sings and dances her way through life while trying to keep up with Big Sisters and Big Brother. I’m Mom and along with Dad, I am guiding these littles through their childhood (without a map, but not afraid to ask for directions) and trying to teach them to….be kind, be silly and be honest.
About this Blog
This is my second blog endeavor. My first blog began as an advocacy tool for older children who needed families. It than became a place for me to document our adoption journey and trip to Colombia to adopt our son. During the adoption process, I did a lot of reading (books, blogs and whatever I could get my hands on). Looking back, almost everything I read was written from the perspective of adoptive parents or professionals, not adult adoptees. I’ve just begun to delve into reading the experiences, opinions and advice of adult adoptees and I’m excited to share what I’m learning and how I am trying to keep these perspectives in mind while raising our son.
I have also been thinking more about the issues that come along with being a transracial family. When our son first joined our family, it was more about making sure he was comfortable and adjusting to this unfathomable (for me!) change for him and how he was attaching to us and his sisters. At that time, my thoughts were consumed with our family’s adjustment. Our social worker once described adding a child to a family (by birth or adoption, in or out of birth order) as adding another piece to a mobile. The mobile will shift and turn until it finds its balance again. I love this imagery because right now we have a pretty nice balance going on but at any moment a breeze could blow and the shifting and moving affects the whole family.
While the air is calm, I’m trying to learn all I can about raising children in a transracial family, respecting the rights and feelings of our son and educating those around us about these same issues. I’m by no means an expert. This blog is just a place for me to write about my experiences and thoughts…use at your own risk .